


Miles to go Before We Sleep

by Sleigh



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: First Kiss, Growing Up Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-13
Packaged: 2018-08-14 20:10:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8027365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleigh/pseuds/Sleigh
Summary: Important kisses Owain and Inigo shared from the beginning of their relationship until the end.





	Miles to go Before We Sleep

It’s July and Inigo is nine years old. Cicadas are howling in the trees and crickets are chirping in the grass. The sun is setting, but Owain doesn’t want to go home yet. He chases Inigo through the fields surrounding his house, past the grove of cherry trees, toward the pond. Inigo runs, laughter spilling out of his mouth, and doesn’t stop until he hears a thump behind him.

Owain tripped and fell face first into the dirt. He gingerly pushes himself up on his knees, blinks a few times. Tears begin collecting in his eyes. “That really hurt,” he says, rubbing his forehead.

“Are you okay?” Inigo turns and walks over to Owain, crouching in front of him. 

Owain shakes his head and takes an unsteady breath, sniffles a little. “It hurts really bad.” He looks up at Inigo, his hand still over the bump on his head. “I need a kiss to make it feel better.”

“A kiss?” Inigo hasn’t ever heard of kisses having healing powers. It might be a thing in Ylisse, but his mother was from far away, somewhere cold. “That’ll make it hurt less?”

“Yeah,” Owain says. He nods. “My mom always kisses me when it hurts, and then it doesn’t hurt so bad.” Owain drops his hand to his side. “Can you kiss me?”

Inigo reaches out, takes Owain’s face in his hands. “Okay,” he says, then leans in and places the lightest, most gentle kiss on Owain’s lips. “Do you feel better now?” he asks.

Owain bursts into laughter. He’s missing a front tooth, but his grin is still radiant. “You’re supposed to kiss me where it hurts! Not there!”

“What?” Inigo’s cheeks begin to burn. He feels like he might cry from embarrassment. “Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I thought you knew!” Owain beams at Inigo. “It’s okay, it feels better anyway.” He stands, the sunset catching his blonde hair just right. He looks like he’s glowing. “I’ll race you back to your house!”

Inigo is still fighting tears of embarrassment as he chases Owain home.

\---

It’s a rainy day in April. Inigo is fourteen, and he’s become an orphan.

He saw his mother die, and he can’t get the sight of it out of his head, he can’t stop feeling that it was his fault. If he was stronger, or if he was braver…

He doesn’t know how Owain found out, but he did. Owain showed up on his doorstep the very next day, then crawled through a window when Inigo was too morose to bother answering the door.

At first Inigo was angry, at Owain, at the world, at himself most of all. He wanted to be alone. He didn’t want to talk.

But Owain didn’t say anything. He made him dinner but didn’t pressure Inigo into eating. He left him little cups of tea everywhere he went, but didn’t get upset when they went cold. When Inigo went outside for some air, Owain checked on him from the window, but didn’t follow. Inigo didn’t understand why Owain knew what he needed, why Owain was actually giving him space for once in his life.

But once Inigo was able to step out of his grief for a moment, he remembered that Owain had been here too, six months ago. Inigo had been too shy to do anything then, too shy and uncomfortable to even acknowledge that Lissa was gone, much less be there for Owain. He must have felt so alone, Inigo realized. He thought he was out of tears, but he began to cry again.

Owain didn’t say anything when Inigo came back inside, didn’t even speak when Inigo roughly pulled him into a hug, when Inigo cried on his shoulder. Owain just held him in silence, rubbed Inigo’s back, left a kiss on his temple.

“I’m not good enough,” Inigo choked out. “She’d be so disappointed in me.”

“She wouldn’t be,” Owain said.

“I wasn’t there for you, and I wasn’t there for her. I can’t protect anyone.” Inigo felt like his heart would burst.

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” Owain holds him so tight, and he feels like Inigo’s only connection to reality. “You did your best. It’s okay.”

Inigo can’t accept it, not yet. But he doesn’t argue with Owain. Instead, he cries and cries, and Owain is patient with him.

\---

It’s late October, and Ylisse is growing colder every day. Inigo recently turned seventeen, and he’s tired of fighting.

Their wounds are still healing, but they don’t have time to rest. The risen are always coming after them, but Inigo is growing weary of everything. What’s the point, if they’ll never beat them all? What’s the point in living a life you have to spend constantly looking behind your back?

He’s on watch this night, and he pokes at the fire absentmindedly. Sparks flutter up into the night air and dissolve into darkness. His steady breathing comes out in puffs. When he’s alone, his thoughts always drift to Owain. If he has any reason to keep going, it’s him.

“Guess who.” 

Inigo jumps when someone suddenly puts their hands over his eyes. If he had any more energy he would probably get upset, probably say something mean that he’d end up regretting. He’s too tired for that. “Let me guess… it’s Owain Dark, hero of ages. Right?”

“Right again!” Owain pulls his hands away then sits down next to Inigo on the log. Their shoulders brush together, but Inigo doesn’t scoot away. He’s been craving that kind of contact from someone else, something gentle and harmless. It’s nice to be touched by someone who isn’t trying to kill you. “So tell me why the legendary Inigo is out here wallowing by himself, when he’s supposed to be on watch with his equally-legendary partner?”

Inigo cracks half a smile. Owain never talked like that before his parents died, but Inigo doesn’t say anything about it. He’s changed too. “There’s no point in waking you up just so you can be bored too.”

“I’m offended that you think I’d be bored by doing my duty to my friends.” Owain frowns, but Inigo can tell by now when he really feels bad and when he’s doing it for effect. He’s faking. “And also… I wanted to talk to you.”

That catches Inigo’s attention. He pokes at the fire again, glancing over at Owain. “Oh yeah? Go ahead.”

“Well…” Owain shifts uncomfortably, opens his mouth and then closes it. He sighs, frowning (genuinely) at the fire. “It’s…”

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” Inigo reaches out, pats Owain’s knee. “I might make fun of whatever you say, but you can still tell me. Especially if it’s serious.”

“But you have to promise not to make fun of this,” Owain says, with a sense of urgency in his voice. The way he looks at Inigo catches him off guard. “You have to promise. This is really serious.”

Inigo feels his heartbeat speed up. He wonders if Owain is in some sort of trouble, or he had a vision of their deaths, or something even worse. He lays the stick down on the dead grass. “Yeah, I promise.” He leaves his hand on Owain’s knee, but shifts to face him. “Just tell me.”

Owain’s cheeks are red and he chews on his lower lip, avoiding eye contact. Inigo is mesmerized by the glow of the fire on his face, but he tries to focus on the matter at hand. “Tell me,” he repeats, softly.

“I like you,” Owain says so fast Inigo hardly catches it. “I-I mean…” He puts his hand over Inigo’s, but it’s sweaty and shaky. “I, uh… I have… serious feelings for you?”

Inigo doesn’t know why that came out as a question, but he’s too stunned to ask if that means anything. He’s so shocked he forgets how to breathe for a moment, and has to take a deep breath to keep himself from passing out. “You mean it?” he blurts out without any thought. Now his cheeks feel like they’re burning too.

Owain won’t look at him and keeps staring at the fire instead. “I know you really like girls, but I… I just wanted to try. I wanted you to know.”

“Look at me,” Inigo says, pulling his hand out from under Owain’s. He takes Owain’s face in his hands, forces Owain to look at him. Now that Owain is staring back at him, he almost loses his resolve. He hesitates for a moment. “I feel the same way about you, okay? So don’t worry about it.”

Owain stares back at Inigo, his eyebrows knit. “But… you don’t flirt with me? Ever?” 

Inigo begins to wonder if the question thing is just a nervous quirk he never picked up on. “It’s… it’s different with you, okay?” He takes an unsteady breath, unsure of how to explain himself. “My feelings are... they're...” He swallows. "I like you too much for that."

Owain smiles. “Then… will you be my boyfriend? And also let me kiss you?” His green eyes almost seem to change color in the flickering light. 

“Yes, and yes.” Inigo says, a lopsided smile on his face. He leans closer, and when he kisses Owain he feels strangely at peace. He feels like he can keep going through a thousand more fights, even a million, as long as Owain is at his side.

\---

It’s March and they’re going to face Grima soon. The camp is tense. There’s rumors going around, talk that Robin is going to sacrifice herself. Things look so grim that Inigo suspects that they might all end up dying. But he’s somehow survived to eighteen, somehow met his parents again, even though they’re not quite his. Somehow, he and Owain have made it through everything they’ve faced. 

“Hey. Come with me,” Inigo pulls on Owain’s sleeve in the middle of camp, tugs Owain along to his tent. His fingers are probably too tight on the fabric, his body language is probably too awkward. Owain is observant. He’ll know something is wrong.

“What’s wrong?” Owain asks, as soon as they’re alone. He fidgets, and Inigo knows that he’s made him nervous.

“It’s nothing,” Inigo lies. “Were you busy? You can get back to talking to Lucina.” It’s something about Falchion. Owain has been tinkering around with it for a while now. He hadn’t realized how much Lucina trusted Owain until all of that started.

“No, she had to go talk to Robin.” Owain reaches out, lightly runs his fingers down Inigo’s forearm. “Talk to me.”

Inigo feels stupid for even bringing Owain here. Maybe he’s always been a morbid child, maybe he’s strange for always thinking about mortality, always thinking about how he might die. Inigo would always tell himself to just keep smiling, that everything would be okay as long as he smiles. But lately, it’s been much easier to fake smiles than to mean them. He knows Owain can tell.

“Inigo.”

Inigo steps closer and kisses him. Not roughly, not passionately. If anything, it was weary. Inigo lifts his hands, lays one on Owain’s shoulder and tangles the other in his hair. His hair is getting messier than usual, he needs a haircut. But nobody has time to think about those things at times like these.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” Owain says, breaking apart from Inigo. “I know you’re upset. Talk to me.” 

That was where they were incompatible. When Owain was upset, he wanted to talk everything out. The longer he had to stay quiet, the more upset he got. Inigo kept things bottled up. He was always too shy, too embarrassed to show that he even got sad. He had to keep smiling, no matter what. He never wanted anyone to know the pressure he was under, how much it was crushing him.

Inigo runs his fingers down the front of Owain’s tunic, tracing the design on it with his fingertips. He sighs, leaning his head on Owain’s shoulder. If he doesn’t say it now, it might never get said. “You know I love you, right?”

Inigo can feel Owain tense up. “W-Well,” he says, “I mean… I kind of assumed you did but you never said that before…” 

There was never time for love when there were wars going on. People tried, but... didn't that usually lead to heartbreak?

“I do. I love you.” Inigo wraps his arms around Owain’s waist, pulling him into a hug. He’d be so happy, so thrilled, to stay here forever. No more fighting. Just the two of them, forever.

“I love you too.” Owain hugs him back, brushes his fingers through Inigo’s hair. 

“Stay with me, okay?” Inigo murmurs. “No matter what happens tomorrow, or in the battle, or after that… stay with me.”

“I will,” Owain says.

\---

It’s November, and snow is already falling in Nohr. Inigo turned twenty this year, a year he went through so many changes. The things that stayed the same have brought him the most comfort.

They’re staying at an inn in Windmire that night, their first night in the capitol. Severa insisted on getting her own room, kept saying she wasn’t going to keep third wheeling Inigo and Owain, keep watching them act mushy in front of her. 

Inigo keeps hearing her cry in her sleep, so he’s actually glad that her attitude hasn’t changed.

Owain is still asleep when Inigo wakes up. He peeks out the window and stares at the snow, lightly lining the streets and the rooftops around them. It reminds him of the stories his mother used to tell him when he was little, of the snow in Regna Ferox. At this point, he’s not even sure that she ever existed. He’s not even sure if the person he used to be ever existed.

“Inigo?” Owain is just waking up, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands. “You still here?”

“That’s not my name, remember?” Inigo walks back over to the bed, runs his fingers through Owain’s hair. “I would expect the legendary sorcerer Odin Dark to be smart enough to remember his boyfriend’s name.”

Owain grins. “Even masters of the night can be forgetful sometimes.” 

Inigo settles on the bed again, next to Owain. He expects Severa to come bang on their door as soon as she wants to get going, and he wants to savor their time together until then. As soon as they go to the castle, they’re going to become strangers. Odin who? Selena who? Inigo is certain that will be the hardest part.

Owain rolls over on his side, reaches out and touches Inigo’s face. “I’ve been thinking. After all of this is over, I want to go back to Ylisse. I want to have a normal life.”

Truthfully, Inigo wanted a normal life from day one. But he wanted to stay with Owain no matter where he went, even if it was back into danger. He knew he wouldn’t be happy in Ylisse all by himself, and he knew someone needed to keep Severa from making Owain cry. 

“That sounds nice,” Inigo sighs, closing his eyes. He reaches up and twines his fingers with Owain’s. “I can finally dance. And you can go on your little adventures. We can do it together.”

“And we can get married.”

Inigo’s eyes flutter open and he stares at Owain. “What?”

“I was just thinking about it and…” Owain chews on his lower lip. “Don’t you think it’d be nice? Just the two of us, forever.”

Truthfully, Inigo hadn’t thought about it much. But seeing how happy his parents were together, his almost-parents from the past… “Then let’s do it. After this is over, let’s get married.”

“Really?” Owain’s eyes widen. “Wait, hold on.” He jumps out of bed, pulling his hand out of Inigo’s too fast and nearly cracking Inigo’s knuckles. Inigo winces, but only frowns as he sits up and watches Owain rush over to his bag, dig around in it for a moment, and then pull something out of it. 

“Here.” Owain holds something out to Inigo, a shiny silver ring, encrusted with sapphires. It’s gorgeous, expensive-looking, something a princess would own. It takes Inigo a moment to realize.

“I can’t take this,” Inigo says. “Absolutely not. It’s way too important to you.” Besides the fact that it’s Owain’s most precious treasure, Inigo doesn’t even think it’ll fit. He has small hands, but he can’t imagine his fingers are as skinny as Lissa’s were.

“It’s not as important as you,” Owain says, reaching out and taking Inigo’s hand. “Here.” He slides the ring onto Inigo’s finger. It’s a bit tight, but it fits. “I’ve always had it with me, and it’s always protected me. Now it’ll protect you.” 

“Owain, I really…” Inigo still feels hesitant. Somehow it feels wrong to take something so precious from Owain. At the same time, he’s so flattered and honored that Owain would give it to him that it brings him to tears.

“Who’s Owain? This is Odin Dark,” Owain leans in and kisses Inigo, “Future husband of Laslow of the Azure Skies!”

“Right, sorry,” Inigo says, fighting back tears and kissing Owain again. He’d keep the ring, if that’s what Owain really wants. It was a shame he’d have to hide it, but just knowing he had it would give him strength. “I can’t go forgetting my fiance’s name, can I?”

\---

“You’ll be fine,” Owain says. It’s May, and Nohr is finally warming up. Inigo is almost 22, and he’s not ready to die.

“No, it’s serious.” Inigo feels safe for now, comfortable in Owain’s arms, locked in Owain’s room. He suspects Niles knows, but he doesn’t think anyone else does. Owain seems to trust Niles, seems to think he won’t tell. As long as it doesn’t get back to the princes, Inigo thinks they’ll be okay.

“You’re always like this,” Owain murmurs against the back of Inigo’s neck. “You always assume the worst. You’ll be fine.” 

Inigo keeps two rings around his neck these days, keeps finding himself fumbling with them when he gets nervous. He tries to keep his hands still. “You don’t get it. He’s going to kill Corrin.”

“That’s awful, but why are you worried? Do you think he’ll lose?”

Owain leaves kisses down Inigo’s neck, and Inigo is silent.

“Inigo?”

Inigo is too grateful to hear his name for the first time in months to scold Owain. “She met with the Rainbow Sage,” he mumbles. “She’s gotten stronger. She’ll have all the Hoshidan royals with her, and their retainers, and…”

“But you’re strong too.” Inigo can feel that Owain has tensed up. It’s almost as if the anxiety is radiating off of him. “I know you’ll be okay. You’re always okay. You have your sword, and you have the ring. It’ll be fine.”

Some part of Inigo wants to get angry, wants to let out his frustration. He wants to tell Owain that no, things won’t be okay. He wants to say that he has a terrible feeling about this, deep in his chest. He wants to tell Owain that he genuinely believes that after he leaves tomorrow, they’ll never meet again. But he doesn’t.

“If I die, you and Selena need to take care of each other. Go back to Ylisse and make sure our parents stay safe.” Inigo’s eyes burn, but he really doesn’t want to cry. “You have to make it out of here. And you have to keep smiling.”

“Don’t talk like this,” Owain says, urgency in his voice.

“Odin--”

“Please.” Owain holds Inigo tighter, even though his arm surely has to be falling asleep after all this spooning. He presses his forehead against the back of Inigo’s neck. “Please don’t.”

“I’m sorry.” Inigo’s mouth feels dry. He’s willing to die for Xander if that’s what it takes, but it was never part of his plans. They were supposed to go home. They were supposed to be together forever. Now, it feels so far out of reach.

Severa hadn’t been this difficult to talk to. Explaining it to Owain was painful, more painful the more he refused to listen to it.

“Stay here,” Owain murmurs. “Stay here until you have to go. Nobody will find out.” 

“That’s dangerous,” Inigo says. He rolls over so he’s facing Owain, then rests his head against Owain’s chest. “If anyone sees me leave, it’ll be bad.”

“I’ll figure something out,” Owain says. “I’ll get Severa in on it. We’ll come up with some excuse.”

“Maybe,” Inigo says. “I’ll think about it.” He can’t imagine he’ll work up the strength to leave at any point, even though he knows how much he should. All he wants to do is stay in this moment as long as he can.

\---

It’s August 7th, and Owain feels wistful. Ferox is cool and sunny, but he won’t be here long. There’s a new Owain now in Ylisse, the real Owain of this world. He knows his parents would never send him away, but he feels like it’s time for him to bow out. He can’t find anywhere that feels like home anyway.

Severa follows him to the harbor. Owain knows she’s going to Nohr, going back to Camilla. The sparkle in her eyes when she talks about Camilla, the way her cheeks tinge pink, makes him feel nostalgic.

“I bet my mother hasn’t even noticed I’m gone,” Severa huffs, the salty breeze blowing through her hair. They walk side by side down the cobblestone streets, seagulls chattering to each other from the rooftops. “All she cares about is the new Severa.” Every word she says is laced with venom.

Owain knows that’s not true, knows Cordelia must be worried sick that Severa has suddenly disappeared again. He’s known her long enough that he knows better than to argue with her. He changes the subject. “Camilla will be happy to see you. I bet she’s missed her most awesome and powerful retainer.”

“Shut up,” Severa hisses, elbowing Owain hard in the side. Her face is red. “She probably… wait, what makes you think I’m going back just because of her?”

Owain grins. “Oh to be young and in love, to feel the twittering of your heart like the fluttering of birds, soaring through the evening twilight…”

“Shut up!” Severa's cheeks redden. “I am so not in love! She’s… she’s just…” Severa crosses her arms and pouts, looking away from Owain toward the ships in the harbor. 

Owain laughs, but there’s a hollow feeling in his chest. His laugh sounds strange to himself. They stop at Severa’s ship, the one right next to his. The details of the voyage are posted in front of the ship, but Owain can’t read Feroxi. Inigo could. If he was here…

Owain swallows hard. “This is yours, right? Are you finally heading off into the blazing sunset, heart aflame with passion?”

Severa makes a growling noise, but doesn’t argue. “Whatever. I’m leaving.” She stalks toward the ship, but hesitates. She turns and hurries back to Owain, pulling him into a short, crushing hug, then letting go of him. “You’d better take care, all right? We’ve got to see each other again someday, so don’t do anything stupid.”

“We have to meet again, it’s our destiny,” Owain says, smiling. “You’d better invite me to the royal wedding.”

“If you don’t shut up you won’t be invited to anything,” Severa says, but she's smiling as she walks up the ramp to her ship. She waves, and Owain is alone.

Owain has no idea how long the trip of Magvell is, but he’s not concerned about it. He immediately makes his way to the top deck of the ship and leans over the side, staring down into the water. The air smells like fish and salt and damp wood.

He pulls the necklace out of the front of his shirt, holds the wedding ring dangling from it between his fingers. He could still vividly remember the day it was given to him, the day after his mother died. He could remember the day Niles slipped it into his palm, told him the war was over.

Owain takes an unsteady breath, presses his lips to the ring. The sky is cloudless, the most brilliant shade of blue. Owain’s heart feels like it could burst.

He tucks the ring back into his shirt and heads inside the ship. He could stay outside and enjoy the beautiful sky, but skies like these make him feel alone.

**Author's Note:**

> \- First of all, I'M REALLY SORRY FOR THIS??????? I seriously have TWENTY-EIGHT drafts of owainigo fics on my laptop but this emo junk was the one that actually got finished. rip.
> 
> \- This fic was five drafts I'm hecking dead. I've been working on it off and on for two weeks. It's a combination of two older fics I'd been working on but couldn't quite get to work.  
> \- Title is from Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost, which is bangin  
> \- Shout out to my boyfriend for reading all these drafts, ur the best  
> \- I listened to a ton of Nujabes while writing this
> 
> p.s I am taking fire emblem fic commissions (pls no kinky stuff or explicit smut) so if you like this pls consider commissioning me or just following my writing blog, shotdunyun.tumblr.com thnx ilu <3


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